I felt that way more than once, and as I've said elsewhere one of the things that kept me from going through with it was fear of messing it up.
And on the very worst of the worst days, there were other things that got me through. Here are a few that might help you out too. And feel free to add your own suggestions in the comments:
- Give yourself something to do first. For me it was eat a final meal, watch one last movie, write a long goodbye letter, take a nap, or any number of other "last" things. In fact at once time I had a whole checklist of final things I had to take care of before I could go. Never quite got through it...
- Watch comedy. May as well go out on a laugh, right? I'd watch my favorite funny stuff saying I could go after. After a while I was happier and decided to put it off one more day.
- Give yourself a project. One thing I learned is that I wanted to die more when I was bored. So I'd give myself a project, even a dumb one to occupy my mind. That usually distracted me from what I was thinking.
- Go eat protein. Blood sugar can be insanely depressive and totally whack you out. Eat something high in protein and low in sugar then check back an hour later. Hey if you're heading for the end what's one more hour?
- Call a friend. Sometimes you really do need someone to talk to and if you pick the right person it can be the difference between staying and going.
- If you don't have a friend to call or don't trust the ones you have then call a hotline. They can be really helpful.
- Stop taking drugs. Dying is supposed to be a beautiful transition between this world and the next and if you do it while on something you'll miss out. Plus when your mind is fucked up you can't make a real decision. So if you're on something then let it wear off before you do anything. If you need to get help then get help to see you through but delay any action until you're in your own mind.
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